Hard times

So life really isn't hard at the moment. I'm just on the vurge of being made a fool of. My character is on the line. And tomorow i will prove to the employees of second shift that i'm an idiot and don't know a freakin thing. Then you probably say. No Kevin thats not true, you know lots of stuff. Then i say. Well you may be true, but i'm not smart about what is going to happen tomorow.

So tomorrow is one of those sink or fly days. Some things are changing at KB to the point that i'm adding a new department to my responsibilities. And of all the departments, i'm being added the biggest department with the most people involved. I'll have to come in normal time and leave an hour later. So instead of only having to work my 45 hours a week. i'll have to work an extra five every day without getting paid. I've been doing it for free since i moved to second shift since i'm such a nice guy and want to help out the company.

To carry on with the same subject in the first subject, one thing i hate THE most is being made fun of for not knowing something. Most of it probably stems from early childhood school. I guess that's probably why im around new people, i don't say a word, because i don't want to say or do anything stupid. I was grown up as a kid to always keep up the Feiertag name. And one way to do that is always make good and right decisions. When people start making fun of me i take it personal. Most days i can block it out, because it's little things and it's only one person. But something like a whole crew turn on you, is not good.

And of course being a manager you can't show that fear. Or they'll eat you a live. All this management stuff seemed so much easier when i was at college and you only had to read about it.

i don't know maybe this is too much emo for ya'll but it will be an interesting journey. I'm sure i'll do fine God Willing.

also because of these changes where losing a supervisor on that shift for at least four weeks. so i will no longer have the ability to leave for 1.5 hours for lunch to go practice with the praise team.

I heard someone at work today also say she was giving up on religion. Which tore my heart in to pieces. Because some kid was bullying her kid and calling him stupid for not knowing the answer to one of the questions. (Kids are mean). So hopefully maybe i can get them to come to Community? But still that hurt quite a lot. Then someone stated that you know what it says in the bible, "he who believes in me shall not parish." Then stated stuff that it doesn't say in the ten commandments that "Thou hast to go to church every sunday." I'm such a wuss. It also hurts how people take the bible and pull out versus without knowing the whole book. Just believing the parts they want to believe.

People at work keep coming up to me saying they have friends out of college getting jobs 10/20k more than what we're all getting paid. Not every company is perfect. So it's tough to leave what you're already used to. But if i want to advance further in this world, i'm going to have to move to other places. When? i'm not sure. Or do i quite, and take a pay cut and go work for a church somewhere? is supervision in manufacturing/production really what i want to do? I probably don't want to do it for the rest of my life. It would be nice to supervise/manage a small group of individuals that knew what they were doing, and where extremely good at it. Or at least educated enough not to call someone a dumb ass behind there back just to start a fight. Or is this just me trying to cop out of where i'm supposed to be. Am i the only that can reach these employees? Am i called for such a time as this?
I guess time will tell. and by the good and bad choices i get to make for my life.

gnight all.